Happy new (late) new year to everyone, guys! I hope 2025 brings lots of blessings for and I can’t wait to share yet another year with all of you beautiful people here <3 The end of every year, if it was a song, would be Piano Man by Billy Joel, while the 1st of January would definitely be Vienna. LOL. Makes sense to me. I apologize in advance, because this post may not be as ‘’lighthearted’’ as my usual content, but I felt like sharing these thoughts as well. I didn’t proofread this in the slightest so forgive me LOL.
The start of a new year.. if you, too, are like me, you probably feel the weight of everything that you could’ve accomplished during the past 12 months that have gone by, instead of focusing on the things you’ve actually did. That was very true for me last year, but thankfully I got rid of this bad habit, at least partly. Still, it can be hard to deal with the passage of time, and I know the pressure of the new year very well: set good intentions, new goals, decide what you want to do, plan it out etc etc. I know it because this feeling has loomed over me since I turned 14 and started taking myself way too seriously. And frankly, I think I still do. I’m turning 19 next month, and for someone who felt old in 5th grade, I have mixed feelings about it, even though my mind is FINALLY starting to clear up. It’s a fragile transition, a delicate moment of growth that has yet to be explored. Living alone, working, graduating, dealing with your friends moving out, having fun.
I, sometimes, become so conceited and hyper focused on the things I want to do that I forget how young I am. It’s another bad habit of mine, I know, and it’s exactly the only thing I plan to get rid of this year. If there’s something I want from 2025, is the ability to not take myself THAT seriously and allow myself to genuinely have fun. That’s it. 2024 has give me everything I could’ve asked for and looking back its honestly crazy. There are lots of things I didn’t talk about on here, of course, but sometimes it just hits me right on the head, seeing how lucky I am. How many things I accomplished and I still am. It’s easy to get caught up into other people lives nowadays, when they’re within reach at the tip of our fingers. People getting married, millionaires, parties.. all of that. Scrolling is another thing I’m gladly leaving behind in 2024, its too easy to get caught up in a cycle of always wanting more and never being satisfied, like this. Comparing ourselves to others kills our inner peace and feeds into nothing but greed.
Ever since I turned 15, drawing has been the only thing I focused on and worked for, to the point of burning myself out. I so fiercely believed it was my calling that I blindly followed this conviction for years. Becoming a mangaka was all I ever wanted from life and I swore to myself, ‘’if I change my mind, that’s not me’’ and I cannot even begin to explain how shaken you feel when you start realizing that maybe you were wrong about something you promised yourself you’d never ever betray after so much hard work. I’m not stopping my art journey, nor anything like that. I didn’t lose my interest in drawing and I still practice daily, but when you thought this way for so long, it’s hard to accept new interests harboring in your mind, things you never thought about before, new hobbies, new goals… it may be silly to most, but I’ve hardly explored any possibilities for myself outside of drawing and mangas and now that I’m doing it, it feels like betraying a little part of myself, even though it’s not actually true. It’s messy, and it’s hard, honestly, navigating this kind of things, but I’m doing it and I’m glad I have the courage to keep pushing, because the joy of discovering (and rediscovering) things that stimulate my creativity in new ways is an immense blessing. So for this year, my goal is to keep myself open minded and experiment with the things I love doing and giving them a chance as well. Writing (and blogging) is on the top of the list for now, but let’s see..
I know I never actually talk about personal matters this way, but I felt like doing it anyways. There’s no reason to hide, and I thank whoever took the time to read into a small piece of my mind. It’s a time of growth for me and I hope to help whoever feels like they need guidance as well. The start of the new year doesn’t actually symbolize anything. Your life doesn’t have to magically change the moment the clock strikes midnight the 1st of January, it starts whenever you decide it does. Be kind to yourselves during this time, January is a tough month, sigh…
And holidays are finally over, at least for me. Thank God, because if I had to survive another Christmas dinner I’m not sure I’d make it out alive with all that food, phew. I feel incredibly lucky and grateful to say that I’ve peacefully spent this time with my family and I hope it was the same for all of you & that you got to eat yummy foods with your loved ones! I spent most of this week with my friends and we had lots of fun. I wanted to make the most of it before we all go back to studying and working LOL not that I don’t like doing it, but still. Unfortunately I don’t have cool pics to upload this time, so it will be for my next post. Since I have lots of content ideas and I’m in a writing frenzy, I FINALLY made a Medium account, so that I can leave this blog for life updates, personal stuff etc.. and focus on topics I’m actually interested in, on Medium, where other people can easily find me! Hopefully I’ll tell more about it very soon.
I know this isn’t my usual post, bit I’m still glad I wrote it and I want to remind to all of you to be kind to yourselves and to keep your loved ones close to you during these fragile moments of growth in our lives. You’ve got plenty of opportunities, experiences and love ahead of you. Life can always start over and its never too late to start in the first place, don’t let these pressures get to you and focus on what matters for YOU. Also, I’m always here to help anyone who might need it.
Thanks to everyone who took the time to read this first post of 2025, in a couple of days this blog will turn 2 years old and I’m so grateful to have cultivated something so special that kept my writing sparkle alive. You are all very dear to me.
What about your holidays, did you have fun? Have you made any wishes for the new year? I hope it brings you lots of happiness and joy!
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